gratitude

Valentines Day, considering a different way

bowl of orchids
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“Did you get a bunch of red roses this morning?” was a question posed to me by a friend on the phone early today. Not that long ago this would have made me feel neglected, unloved and insecure for the reason that my significant loved one never buys me flowers or remembers special days.

He does not need to, for I have fresh flowers in my home everyday from my own garden. They are free to pick and fresher than purchased from any shop. I arrange them in a floating bowl if the stems are too short for a vase, or use a single flower with some green leaves in a piece of ikebana if the pickings are slim. You don’t need a lot to have an effective display. I am currently looking at three orchids resting on a large green bed of foliage in a floating bowl, which gives my home a tranquil spa like feel. My loved one shows me his love and gratitude in different subtle ways every day!

This brings me to the subject of Valentines Day. Many years ago, on Valentines Day, I bought my husband a coffee mug with a cute picture and loving message on it. He bought me a new TV! We both laughed at the ludicrous contrast and resolved not to fall for the commercial and social pressure any more. I have a history of working in a retail sector for twenty years, where Valentines Day was a major selling day. This fact put me off the way it is commonly celebrated, by buying gifts. We are led to believe by the media that we are not showing our love unless we spend money on gifts! It seems the more expensive, the more we show our love. I feel that by doing this a big factor is overlooked. That factor is gratitude for the other person to be part of our lives. Do we want to show gratitude one day a year (with an expensive gift) or every day of the year (with subtle messages)? What is more powerful for our relationship?

Do you want to be a victim of the “commercial brainwashing machine” or could you come up with your own unique way to make the loved one in your life feel special today (or any day of the year) and show your love and gratitude for them without spending any money? What special talent do you have to draw on? Are you a poet or writer? You could write a special message. Are you a painter? You could paint a picture with a special message. Are you a good cook? Cook a special favorite dish today. The options are endless and individual. The fact that these don’t cost extra money makes it possible to do it more often and not just on Valentines Day.

I feel a personalized message of love and gratitude is much more powerful than going to a shop and buying an exuberantly expensive bunch of flowers or gift. I am glad and grateful for the love in my life, especially because it is shown in a very different personal way, that is far more subtle and frequent than just one day a year.

How do you show your loved ones they are appreciated and special to you? Please share in the comments below:

The importance of relationships

Valuable legacy
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Someone I knew passed away last week. I know this happens and is always a sad event as you realize you will never see that person again in this lifetime. This one was special though. This person was far too young to die, but managed to squeeze as much as possible out of the short time left.

He ticked off his bucket list in spectacular manner and made sure that all friends knew they were appreciated and loved by him. He always had a smile for everyone, always trying to uplift and share happiness, despite his illness and suffering. The result was that everyone had huge respect and love for him. His life was celebrated with a massive party, featuring live music and spontaneous jam sessions, that felt more like a family reunion than a wake, and brought friends from all over together. There was a sad undercurrent, especially for his closest relatives and partner, but the emotions I felt most, were love and determination to let his legacy live on. To live life as he did, not dwelling on sadness, but living in “radness”, because you never know when your time comes. It made me think about the value of all relationships in our lives and the effect we have on the people we interact with, whether they are relatives or acquaintances.

I contemplated the importance of uplifting rather than complaining and making sure that when our time comes to an end, we leave a legacy that will inspire and be beneficial for all left behind. This is what makes us immortal, for we live on in our legacy! This is the “butterfly effect” in action.

This morning I found a friends post on Face Book as follows:

“I’m going to be watching to see who cares about friendship. Thank you for being a part of my life! So, if you read this, leave ONE WORD as to how we met. . DON’T SHARE!! . Once you respond, if it’s the right answer, I will inbox you this post to post on your wall. Only one word!”

I normally ignore those posts that you see all the time calling for attention that only serves to satisfy the ego’s neediness, but after the above event I could not resist responding to show my friend that I did indeed read his posts and cared. The result was that I had to repost it of course. I felt a little annoyed at this, bothering my friends on Face Book, and explained to my friend in PM that I’d only do it for him and not because I thought it was a good reflection of how many people read my posts, knowing that most will ignore to comment for a variety of reasons, that do not include lack of love.

How wrong I was! I am unsure if the fact that I added a small vague sentence at the start referring to the earlier event that made me realize the importance of relationships had anything to do with it, or whatever the reasons were, but I was blown away with the amount of friends that responded! The words they left brought back so many happy memories! Not only that, but I ended up talking/typing with an old friend on the other side of the world, who I had not spoken to for decades, in PM for half an hour, before we decided to continue talking on Skype for another hour and a half!

This made my day and I can’t help but think that this all resulted from the legacy of a friend who knew what is really important in life, which is not what you do for a living, the car you drive or the clothes you wear! It is how you appreciate and interact with the people you encounter in your life!

I am so Glad to have the friends and family I have! Thank you all for sharing the love and experiences together, because that is what will be remembered and valued most in the end!

With gratitude, Pollyesther

P.S. Feel free to share your thoughts on this in the comments.

The Car Park

Car Park
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A while back my husband had to go and have a test done at the hospital. I needed to come along to drive him home. When we arrived the car park was full, so I dropped him off at the entrance and proceeded to drive around looking for a suitable parking spot. I found one in a private car park and left it there for a bit while checking up on my husband to see how much longer he was going to be.

The staff recommended to go shopping for a couple of hours, but with a very low bank balance at that time, this did not appeal to me at all. I decided to go and move the car to a better parking spot instead and wait in the car. The car park was still full, so I drove to a nearby side street and parked in front of a house and relaxed in the car for a bit, killing time, waiting and hoping a park near the hospital would become available before I had to pick up my husband.

When I drove back about an hour later, I spotted the perfect spacious parking spot in a no pay zone with the shade of a large tree! I quickly drove around the corner and up to the vacant spot, only to find someone else had just beat me to it and parked in the middle of it, preventing my car to fit next to his. A little annoyed at his selfish behavior I thought to myself, if only he moved it a couple of inches I could fit too…..and proceeded driving to the end of the narrow dead end lane to turn around and keep looking for a better spot.

As I came back around, I saw the car moving back and forth and the guy waving at me! He somehow realized his mistake and made room for me! He even got out of his car and guided me into the now narrow spot safely! I made sure I showed him my gratitude for being such a gentleman and smiled internally for the “lucky coincidence”. Please share your experiences in the comments below.

How I had fun hanging out the washing today

Fun washing
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Last night I felt a bit down for about half an hour due to late nights, early mornings and hard work in between and thought to myself better to practice what I “preach” today. I was hanging out the washing in a bit of an improved mood already, because I had a better night sleep and it simply was a gorgeous day to be out there with the sun shining happily upon our back yard and a stiff sea breeze keeping things very pleasant.

That does not include hanging out the washing on a hoist! I was struggling to put the pegs in the right spot while hanging onto the lines for dear life in an attempt to keep it still for long enough to accomplish that. The large towels I put up from the load before were catching a lot of wind and made the hoist turn like a chairoplane! That was it! I had enough!

I gave up my resistance and decided to go with the flow and use my Glad Game. I stopped for a brief moment and looked around the garden, said thanks for the beautiful day, looked in appreciation at all the beautiful flowers beaming smiles at me and proposed a little game in my mind. If thoughts really create reality, prove this to me again and stop the wind for long enough to peg down my next item in a perfect spot for it.

Next I grabbed a piece of clothing and stepped back from the laundry basket. I looked up and to my amazement found a perfect empty spot of line and sufficient time to do the pegging in comfort! I giggled to myself saying: ” yea right, that was just a coincidence!” I tried again, same thing, grab the first item on top, step back, looked up and found another moment like the one before! Now I was giggling even louder! Ok, This is a really fun game! It kept going till the basket was empty!

Not only did I get my task done in no time, I also had a ball doing it! The feeling of lightheartedness stayed with me until now! I am normally not a fan of chores, but they need to be taken care of and you may as well have fun, go with the flow and see what happens playing the Glad Game while you are at it! Where can you use the Glad Game? Feel free to share in the comments below.

Enjoying the journey

Sunrise in the mountains
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I am looking at the glistening gums outside my window. After a warm, humid sunny day yesterday, I woke early to see a beautiful sunrise surrounded by some patches of blue sky and puffs of streaky clouds. Not long after, the thick and heavy looking cloud band came over the hill and it started pouring. This is not surprising, after all it is Spring in Australia at the moment. It is the long weekend of the Melbourne Cup, when most Australians either fully focus on horse racing, or their weekend away with an eye on the score in country pubs near their camp sites in the bush on a river somewhere.

I decided to drive up to the house in the mountains, where I also spend 3 Months in Winter. Every year we hold our annual Cup Weekend trout fishing competition there among friends. Apart from being an informal fishing competition, it is also an annual social get together and a lot of fun catching up with people you don’t see every day, but have known for years.

Even though it is a fair drive of at least five and a half hours, excluding the necessary fuel and toilet stops, I have come to enjoy it. The first few times I drove it on my own, it felt like a tedious waste of time and I could not wait to arrive and get it over with. Slowly over time my attitude towards this regular journey changed. At first I started to love the last two hour leg of the trip on the narrow winding road, that followed an old river through the mountains for a long way. Occasionally you had to slow down for a small settlement, but it was generally extremely quiet and in the middle of nowhere surrounded by seemingly untouched nature. On some of my late night trips up, I saw more wombats (they look like oversized nocturnal guinea pigs on steroids) than cars on the road. It made me feel like I had already arrived at my destination and was just taking in the views and nature surrounding me.

One day, a while back now, I was stuck behind an over size truck with an unusual load that had me curious in an earlier part of the journey. I think it was some kind of large water tank, but looked a bit like a rocket ship, that was in front for a long way and slowed the trip right down. There was no way around it, so to my relief it finally turned off the main road I was following and allowed everyone to get on with their journeys. That day was a busy day and it took a bit of time to get through the next town, due to congestion. By the time the following town came in sight, you guessed it, the truck was in front of me again! The slow moving truck must have somehow bypassed the busy town where ever it had gone! This made me look up the maps of the area and find my next favorite leg of the journey, so much quieter and more scenic as well! Driving on these secondary roads made me realize I liked driving through nature and on quiet roads and as a result I slowly started finding more and more country roads that did not hold up at all, to break up the boring bits, naturally, without consciously looking for them.

Yesterday was another one of those days! Police had shut off the main road (a half hour long mostly straight and boring drive) between two towns and was directing traffic onto a country side road. I was a little unsure at the start as it veered off a long way in a different direction to where I thought it should go, to get to the next town, and felt slightly nervous this could possibly add a lot of time to the already long trip. There was no need, as it took about the same time and was amazingly scenic and quiet. I loved looking over the rolling hills and long distance views with the sun starting to get low in the sky. There were a few farms and sheep dotted around and the landscape varied so much more than the usual drive! I’ll be back there again!

This event reinforced to me again that if we relax, enjoy the moment, focus more on what we enjoy and trust things to fall into place to our liking, this is exactly what eventually happens. Not just on actual road trips, but also in every other part of our lives. Every road block is at first met with resistance, only to turn into an opportunity to find a better way in the end! I am so glad the road block forced me to find this gem of a D-tour yesterday, for it made my journey so much more enjoyable! Please share your experiences in the comments below.

Storm Lovers

Wispy Clouds
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First I would like to apologize for my lack of action on this blog over the past few months. Between working full time in the snow and managing a busy lodge, socializing with the guest at night time, I have not had much time to dedicate to writing at all. My fickle prepaid stick connection allowed me to post one story I had prepared earlier on a “good reception day” off. Despite that, I was pleased to still see regular visitors reading my stories and would like to thank everyone that stuck by me.

I did find a moment of inspiration again while doing the towies lunch relief shift, sitting in the top lift hut for an hour. That is the only time that I get a chance during my working day to “zone out” and relax to some degree, while keeping an eye on the poma’s and making sure they retract properly and not tangle around the cable, which would stop the lift until the technicians come down to fix it again.  Besides that I also make sure the few midday guests get off okay.

I love looking at the view over the valley’s and the sky from this tiny hut on top of the hill. In all the years I have worked there, I have started to notice a pattern in the weather, about which I wrote this recent poem:

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Storm Lovers

Wispy clouds looking like a feather,

talk to me about a change in the weather.

Next, the wind will come,

which can be quite scary for some.

Trees will blow over, branches will snap,

lifts will close and powder lovers… will clap!

For they all know that what comes after,

is the cause of so much fun and laughter.

They weather the storm just knowing,

their turns in the Powder will soon be flowing.

Big airs aloft,

with landings real soft.

Get your bases waxed,

because you know what is coming next!

_______________________________

Yes, we did get some nasty storms this season, with one blowing over at least 6 trees across the track I use to get from the lodge to the main road and back. Thankfully this happened while I was at work and no one got hurt, but it did make for an adventurous trip home, attempting to get through. Lucky there was only one massive old gum tree, that left just enough room around the hole, where the roots used to be, to create a new path around it. Most of the others were small enough to drive over the thinner branches on the end of the trees. I stopped to try and drag one a bit more out of the way, because the branches were a little high and I was concerned they might snap and bounce back up, damaging the car in the process. As I did this, I was surprised to see headlights coming up behind me. Someone else as crazy as me tackling a four wheel drive track with obstacles in the dark! It was my friend and neighbor, who came through to check out if it was passable, because his partner had to go to work that night. I was pleased he turned up and helped me, because the tree was a lot heavier than I would have thought looking at it from the car. After saying my thanks and goodbye we both proceeded to drive home, grateful we made it there safely.

One of the snapped trees along my drive to work

One of the snapped trees along my drive to work

As I looked around the house, it became clear that this storm had been the worst one I had seen in all those seasons I had lived there. I found the cover of the chimney in the middle of the driveway with the pipe almost in the dam below the house. The couch, that used to be under the roof on the back deck had moved itself over to the deck behind the woodshed. The recently emptied recycling bin was completely missing, despite the fact that I had weighted it down with a few logs on top before I left for work in the morning. The old broken washing machine that had been up against the wall on another deck, awaiting a trip to the tip, was almost falling off the edge and the lid had detached itself and was a long way up the drive! There was a tree across the main drive to the house (I came up the other one) and a few more down around the house. I was so glad there was not more damage to the house! After I was satisfied with my efforts of tidying up for the night , I put my torch back in the car and made myself something for dinner.

The next morning I woke up to the pleasant surprise of fresh snow on the ground. Despite now being an adult, this still gives me the same excitement as when I was a child growing up in Europe. For those that have never seen snow, the closest thing to this feeling I can think about is when you wake up early as a child on Christmas Day to find Santa has visited and there are so many presents under the tree, you don’t know which one to open first! Snow on the ground may make the drive to work a little more hazardous, but the fun of playing or working in fresh snow far outweighs this issue. You just know that it is only there for a short time and have to enjoy it while it lasts.

Waking up to fresh snow is always exiting for me

Waking up to fresh snow is always exiting for me

This is not unlike life itself, where everyone has to get through numerous storms, but once the storm clears, we have to see and grab the opportunities it leaves us at the right time. As a result we can get exited about life again and look forward to this new chapter with gratitude. For if it was not for the storms in our lives, we would not appreciate and enjoy the good times as much!

I am so glad the storms of the past Winter season brought us so much fresh snow! It allowed me the to get plenty of work, complete my level 2 Alpine certificate, meet loads of beautiful new friends and guests and ski more miles than in any other season before. Of course practice makes perfect, so I also enjoyed it even more with my newly learned improved techniques.

Please share your thoughts on storms in your life in the comments below. I look forward to reading them!